Snot, Hulu, and Raman Noodles

loungpants5What day is it?

Is it time to suck on my inhaler or squirt the nasal spray?

What’s the proper trajectory arc to hit the waste basket with a loaded Kleenex?

Why does Hulu ask which commercials I want to watch when they only have three? (Psst, I’m not running out to buy Absolut Vodka, guys.  I’m not running anywhere.  See these pajama pants?)

Can a person eat too many Raman noodles?

When the orange juice is gone, does the whole universe fall into the vacuum or just my refrigerator?

Have scientists ever measured the maximum amount of snot a body can produce?  Could I borrow their buckets?

Are my cats permanently scarred from thinking my cough is a German Shepherd?

How many hours of Pinterest equal a free bottle of Robitussin?

If I pass out in the shower, does it still count as exercise?

Did the nurse record my new doc’s “Yikes!” when she listened to my lungs?  That was sweet.  I’d like to scrapbook that.

So many questions, so little air.

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