The Weekly Penny Positive

I think I got this deck of cards from RubyDogArt on Etsy (though my memory on this is Fruit Loopy).  The art on the face cards was so beautiful, I just added borders and quotes to match.  They came together faster, though that meant I could spend more time exploring borders.

Happy Valentines Day

(I bought myself a dozen white roses, so I’m feeling quite fantasy-loved.)

And Now For Something Completely Different…

(Gosh, Monty Python fits Everywhere)

Last month a magazine put out by our local paper sent a reporter and photographer to my house to interview me about my art.  This was wildly unexpected, but turned out to be a fun day.  Anytime I can talk about my art and what it means to me is a Good Day.

The article came out in Green Country Living on Sunday (“Green Country” is what this part of Oklahoma is called).  At yoga class on Monday, lots of the ladies beamed at me and said they’d enjoyed the piece.  I hadn’t seen it, but my yoga teacher brought her copy for me (It came out as a Sunday supplement).

The story was pretty lame, considering all the things the writer and I talked about, but the photography was lovely.  I’m glad to have these professionally staged shots of my work.  That makes the unfortunate prose worth it.

If you really want to read the article (starting on page 60), you can do that here, but I’d give it a pass.

 

February is a Verb

My brain Februaried this morning.  It does that sometimes.  It woke up anxious and running from the nightmare that chased it into the morning.  Gray, frigid, murky, my perception Februaries only in black and white, good/bad, can/can’t.

I Februaried my therapy appointment today, siting weather (both internal and external) as my reason for cancelling.  Guilt, failure, rotten self-esteem February around me like Pig Pen’s dust cloud.

There are at last count eleven different art projects sitting around the house half dressed.  Flitting from one to another to find something that might unFebrury my mind makes me February even more.  It’s a Möbius strip.  I am Schrödinger’s Cat.

I vowed to find something else to natter at me on the TV, but I Februaried “Bones” again.  For the third time in a row.  I can’t summon the energy or interest to search for anything else, so I recite the dialogue along with the characters. I try to find something new to notice, but I February instead.

My youngest grand-nephew plays basketball on Saturdays.  He’s eight and fun to watch, but I’ve Februaried his games so far.  Everything (note the black or white thinking) is too hard.  I even February the effort it takes to turn a noun into a verb.  My mushy brain doesn’t want to work that hard.

And on top of it all, today is my blog’s ninth birthday.

Like most bloggers, I go through bouts of wondering if it’s time to call it quits.  But as long as I continue to February and unFebruary, A Mind Divided remains important to my sanity.  And for a bit of birthday fun, I Februaried some notable events from 2011:

  • Twilight: Breaking Dawn was the Number 3 Top Grossing movie of the year.
  • My dad died.
  • The Beaver, Mel Gibson’s first movie after his psycho-meltdown, was released.
  • We killed Osama Bin Laden.
  • Flowers of War was also released, a Christian Bale movie no one saw.
  • Heaven is for Real was the Number One bestseller in Non-Fiction.
  • The Big tsunami devastated Japan.

To try to UnFebruary this list, I should add:

  • Captain America: The First Avenger was released.
  • My grand-nephew, Zane, was born.
  • Melissa McCarthy won an Emmy for Mike and Molly.
  • C’Mon by the Minnesota group Low was voted the Best Indi album of the year.
  • The Congresswoman who got shot in the head, Gabrielle Giffords, walked back into Congress.
  • Rolling Stone voted Adele’s 21 as the Number One album of the year.
  • A 71-year-old woman foiled jewel thieves with her handbag in Northhampton, England.

Yeah, Gran definitely Februaried those idiots.

The Weekly Penny Positive

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Tribal Magic

It’s raining in Muskogee this morning.  I needed to mail an Etsy order, so I stopped for donuts (donuts are big here.  As are hot dogs) and got in line at my coffee drive-through.  A little pick-me-up for a drizzly day.

Then I noticed the old blue truck in front of me.  It had a “Bernie” bumper sticker.

I jumped out of the car and scurried up to the truck’s window.  I thanked the Sweet Young Thing driving for her courage.  She was too surprised to say anything but a soft, “Ohhhhhhh,” her gentle face tearing up as she reached out to shake my hand.  She had the warmest hands.

Full to the brim myself, I paid for my coffee and for the person behind me in line (a Random Act of Kindness I learned from my friend, Cheryl).

These moments of connectedness come more often now.  Maybe I’m just hypomanic after getting over the flu and the subsequent depression, but it really doesn’t matter.  Moments like this help me stay open to more moments, to watch for them, to set an intention to find them.  I record them in my Good Life jar so I won’t forget.

Moment by moment, scrap by scrap, I’m creating the kind of life I’ve always wanted.

It’s a Good Day to be on an Adventure.

Weekly Penny Positive

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Once Upon a Time

Over the flu and in the Grey, which often happens after I’m physically ill.  It’s a melancholy, weepy place where regret and self-pity slink from shadow to shadow.  I have to be vigilant here, which pisses me off, so there’s a lot of bouncing around in the mist.

The thoughts generated by my gray matter here are particularly sneaky.  The Almost True and Slightly Off entice me into following them down paths that grow darker bit by bit.  Like a Grimms’ Fairy Tale, I end up lost in the woods.

So I pull out my Bag of Tricks and rummage through until I find a compass.  Or a sandwich.

The first Bad Day, nothing in my bag helped.  Nothing pointed me in the right direction or comforted me.  I panicked a little bit.

Then, like a Fairy Godmother, a memory slipped through the fog.  I remembered making a set of cards a few years back that helped me through a similar Forest, so I pulled Larry and Bernice out of my bag and we started leaving bread crumbs.

I’ve only traveled with Bernice so far, but I’ll get Larry to join in today.

I also stumbled across an Emotional Health Assistant Ap called Youper.  It’s a sort of daily check-in with an AI therapist to capture mood and thoughts with very nice guided meditations and exercises on gratitude.  Of course, it’s not really an artificial intelligence, just an algorithm that responds generically, but if I squint just right, I can pretend it has a beard and pointy hat.

Companions make a dangerous journey more tolerable—and it is dangerous here in the Grey. While the light is dim, it’s enough to keep going. And I’ve got plenty of sandwiches for all of us.

 

The Weekly Penny Positive

Since I’ve been housebound the last couple of weeks with a weird cold/flu combo, I’ve had to follow this axiom—looking forward to my Art Journal Round Robin Group starting up again next month, letting the banter and good writing of all 12 seasons of “Bones” counteract the bathroom-bound moments, the simple joy of a Jello cup, Emmett’s cat-psychic move to sleeping on my bed instead of under his blanket, falling asleep on my bed while arting.

Yesterday I was able to keep down (in?) Minute Rice cooked in chicken broth, so today I’ll chance foraging for Fresca and Kleenex.  The sun hides behind clouds this morning, but I’ll bring my Light with me.

 

The Weekly Penny Positive

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