The Pointy End

Most days, the amphetamine I take for Binge Eating Disorder lifts the depression end of my Bipolar stick.  It will feel like a Lost Day when I wake up in the morning, but then the Vyvanse kicks in and functionality returns.

Other days, like today, the drug doesn’t do a thing.

Weird that.  But drugs and their supposed effects are weird and ephemeral.  And there’s no accounting for the weirdness of brain chemistry.  Or the weather.  Or Mercury’s pull on the tides.

All I can do is shift my stick into low gear and jettison any plans I might have made.  Self-care becomes the priority.

The most important thing is to avoid beating myself with the Stick, and to keep the pointy end aimed elsewhere.  Let that be a warning.

10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Catherine Cheng, MD
    Feb 24, 2020 @ 18:05:03

    So love your honesty, your gritty eloquence, and your subversive, humorous irreverence. ❤️

    Reply

  2. Live & Learn
    Feb 24, 2020 @ 20:24:47

    Yes! And that’s the punch line!

    Reply

  3. Kiki
    Feb 25, 2020 @ 03:49:19

    Wonderful post on something we mostly have no idea of. Written with an ounce of Making fun of Oneself (which I so appreciated in our English friends…. and something most French and Swiss people are thoroughly lacking), yet you point out ‘what’ it is and How you are able to live with it, being kind to yourself instead of beating yourself up over it – you learned one important lesson well: If we don’t appreciate and accept, even (to a certain extent) love ourselves, we can’t be ‘good’ for others…. Have a good/better/fantastic day.

    Reply

    • Sandy Sue
      Feb 25, 2020 @ 07:13:36

      Thanks so much, Kiki. I try not to post until I can see the irony or, at least, the lesson I need to take from whatever my brain dishes out. It’s WahWahWah otherwise, and who wants to read that?!

      Reply

  4. CatJammy
    Feb 25, 2020 @ 14:55:55

    Boy, did I need to hear this today! Thank you for crafting your words so beautifully. 💜

    Reply

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