February is a Verb

My brain Februaried this morning.  It does that sometimes.  It woke up anxious and running from the nightmare that chased it into the morning.  Gray, frigid, murky, my perception Februaries only in black and white, good/bad, can/can’t.

I Februaried my therapy appointment today, siting weather (both internal and external) as my reason for cancelling.  Guilt, failure, rotten self-esteem February around me like Pig Pen’s dust cloud.

There are at last count eleven different art projects sitting around the house half dressed.  Flitting from one to another to find something that might unFebrury my mind makes me February even more.  It’s a Möbius strip.  I am Schrödinger’s Cat.

I vowed to find something else to natter at me on the TV, but I Februaried “Bones” again.  For the third time in a row.  I can’t summon the energy or interest to search for anything else, so I recite the dialogue along with the characters. I try to find something new to notice, but I February instead.

My youngest grand-nephew plays basketball on Saturdays.  He’s eight and fun to watch, but I’ve Februaried his games so far.  Everything (note the black or white thinking) is too hard.  I even February the effort it takes to turn a noun into a verb.  My mushy brain doesn’t want to work that hard.

And on top of it all, today is my blog’s ninth birthday.

Like most bloggers, I go through bouts of wondering if it’s time to call it quits.  But as long as I continue to February and unFebruary, A Mind Divided remains important to my sanity.  And for a bit of birthday fun, I Februaried some notable events from 2011:

  • Twilight: Breaking Dawn was the Number 3 Top Grossing movie of the year.
  • My dad died.
  • The Beaver, Mel Gibson’s first movie after his psycho-meltdown, was released.
  • We killed Osama Bin Laden.
  • Flowers of War was also released, a Christian Bale movie no one saw.
  • Heaven is for Real was the Number One bestseller in Non-Fiction.
  • The Big tsunami devastated Japan.

To try to UnFebruary this list, I should add:

  • Captain America: The First Avenger was released.
  • My grand-nephew, Zane, was born.
  • Melissa McCarthy won an Emmy for Mike and Molly.
  • C’Mon by the Minnesota group Low was voted the Best Indi album of the year.
  • The Congresswoman who got shot in the head, Gabrielle Giffords, walked back into Congress.
  • Rolling Stone voted Adele’s 21 as the Number One album of the year.
  • A 71-year-old woman foiled jewel thieves with her handbag in Northhampton, England.

Yeah, Gran definitely Februaried those idiots.

7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kiki
    Feb 05, 2020 @ 13:34:04

    ha ha ha… I don’t know what to say but I’m laughing out loud at Super Gran! As per your new word creadtion: Yep, why ever not! Makes total sense to me. Just don’t give in completely to your February februaring…. You’ll get there, I know it. Concentrate on marching into March 😉


  2. Kerri Bradley Ronne
    Feb 05, 2020 @ 16:39:18

    OMG, this is brilliant! I laughed so hard! February is definitely the least optimistic month of the year. All I want is spring, but first we have to get through February, and it lasts so-o damn lo-ong! I should be editing a dissertation right now but got Februaried into a coffee shop where I’m just sitting, sedated by the snow endlessly sliding past this gray, gray sky.


  3. Jennie P
    Feb 05, 2020 @ 20:55:26

    I want to grow up to be like the woman in Northampton. Love you forever.


  4. Writer Lori
    Feb 06, 2020 @ 04:35:22

    I’m with Kiki, Sandy. February makes one’s nerves feel easily friable. March towards March with great ardor, my friend!


    • Sandy Sue
      Feb 06, 2020 @ 08:49:16

      In reality, February and I are fine, but I know a lot of people who have trouble this time of year. And since I was in trouble yesterday, I needed a new way to communicate that. After nine years, it’s a challenge to find a different way to say, “I’m in a bad place.”


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