Be Careful What You Ask For

A few weeks ago I set the intention of Creating a New Life.  I forget sometimes that the Universe is not always gentle in how It responds.

One aspect of building this new life is to find a way to contribute to and be a part of the community.  I thought that meant working as a volunteer in some capacity.  I tried the Animal Rescue League, and felt pretty successful about my day there.  But, when it was time to go back this week, I was in a deep depression.  I rescheduled, hoping I could go back when the depression lifted, then ended up canceling altogether.  As much as I celebrated my ability to get there on time and put in three hours of washing windows and collecting dog poop, I had to admit I couldn’t tolerate the animals’ emotional pain or the way the staff has to shut themselves down to deal with it.  It was an experiment.  Now I know.

However, the Universe plopped other options in my lap.  Through calls and emails, I found a local group of Unitarian Universalists.  The core group of about 30 people are just starting the process of affiliating with the national UU organization.  They’re enthusiastic and welcoming.  I felt right at home.  At the second gathering I attended, I was impressed by the meditation and talked with the woman who led it.  She said a poll of the members showed that most people are hungry for more spirituality in the services, but the board wasn’t sure how to provide that.  Like me, she and her husband would like to start a meditation group.  And then, she invited me to lead the meditation at the next service.  A way to contribute and be part of the community.

I also volunteered to do the program at last week’s T.O.P.S. meeting.  Usually, someone will read an article about weight loss or nutrition.  I decided to tell a bit of my story and speak about using awareness with compulsive eating.  The response floored me.  People lined up afterward to talk to me, about their own struggles with mood disorders or those of loved ones, about the concept of awareness (how does that work again?), about standing up in front of a group and telling something so personal (maybe I could do that, too).  This week I received emails and cards from members of the group about my presentation.  Yesterday at the meeting, folks were still talking about it and thanking me.  I offered to do more programs as needed.

Then, last night, I followed up on a connection I made at my dad’s funeral this fall.  My cousin, Ray, confessed to me at the funeral reception that he meditated regularly.  He seemed agreeable to sitting together sometime, so I vowed to myself that I’d push through my social phobia and call him.  I procrastinated.  I didn’t know Ray except as a name and a face in the haze of distant relatives.  But, I had a feeling.  I made the call.

Last night I discovered a kindred spirit, another seeker.  Last night we shared our stories, sat meditation together, shared more stories.  Ray loaned me a book that I didn’t know I was looking for, a piece of my story, October Roads, that was missing.  What a gift to find him, precious fruit on my own family tree.

Yeah, be careful what you ask for.  The Universe will provide.

11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. carlarenee45
    Feb 10, 2012 @ 05:48:36

    This isn’t a sarcastic question, I have really been curious about this. I watch “how I met your mother” and they mention the universe wants this or did this like it is a being that communicates, creates, and reacts. I wonder where this came from. are we talking about the same universe that we live in? How can it control or create if it itself was created or formed?


    • Sandy Sue
      Feb 10, 2012 @ 07:34:51

      What good questions! My feeling about HIMYM, is that they’re saying God without saying God—sort of post New Age-speak. But, there is a philosophy that posits many levels of energy make up the world we live in (and beyond). In this system, thought, emotion, consciousness all hold energy and interact with the other energies around them. When I use the word Universe, I’m really talking about the Creative Energy in this system. If you’re interested, I’d recommend a couple of books. Waking Up by Charles Tart and Deeper Man by J.G. Bennett.


  2. Kathryn McCullough
    Feb 10, 2012 @ 06:10:17

    Oh, I so love this, Sandy. And how much more perfectly the meditation gig fits you–much more so than puppy-poop-picker-upper! Congratulations on enlarging yourself by reaching out to others!


  3. Jinjer Stanton
    Feb 10, 2012 @ 11:16:45

    I am so happy for you! I knew it should be possible.


  4. docrob50
    Feb 12, 2012 @ 00:11:46

    I’d pay to come listen you and I’d use at least three kleenex and wanna run up afterwards and thank you for sharing the courage and beauty of the human heart.


  5. rachelmiller1511
    Feb 15, 2012 @ 14:42:56

    Wow, I wish I was brave enough to talk to groups about bipolar/mood disorders! I think it’s something most people have experience of but just don’t talk about.

    I love meditation. I go to a monthly group, where we have crystals, beautiful music and chill out with a guided meditation, it’s so lovely!


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