Do Not Fold, Bend or Staple

There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it.

— Alfred Hitchcock

‡ ‡ ‡

Girding my loins for what was surely to be excruciating pain, I followed the nurse into Dr. McCune’s treatment room.  My voice quavered when I told her I’d probably need a pan to puke in, that pain did that to me.

But five minutes later, the staples were out and my taciturn surgeon on his way to the hospital.

Wha???

I sat on the table and sobbed, not from pain but relief.

Oh, the knots we tie ourselves into!  I’d been dreading this day, sure the folks in the waiting room would call the police when they heard me screaming, afraid I’d have to punch my doctor in the nose.  And it was nothing.  As Christopher Robin says to Pooh, “Silly old bear!”

Actually, Dr. McCune cracks me up.  He reminds me of the actor, Sam Elliott—classic cowboy silence and steely-eyed calm.  I babbled while he worked, asking him how big the tumor was, did he weigh it, why the incision was so long, blah, blah, blah.  The only answer he gave to all that was he didn’t want the scar to be “dog-eared” and that pathology “didn’t find anything.”  Then, he helped me sit up, patted me on the knee and left.  If he had a cowboy hat, he would have touched a finger to it and muttered, “Ma’am.”

I’ll just pack up my little Drama Kit and slink over to Des Moines for a cuppa.  I’ll work on Callinda in a calm and refined manner, then sit meditation with my friends.

Move along, now.  The show’s over.

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9 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. JAPLM
    Dec 02, 2011 @ 09:18:24

    Glad it went smoothly for you : )

    Reply

  2. Kathryn McCullough
    Dec 02, 2011 @ 09:30:51

    Thank God, my friend. This is great news. Hope you have a pain-free weekend, as well!
    Hugs,
    Kathy

    Reply

  3. pegoleg
    Dec 02, 2011 @ 09:36:39

    I’m so glad this wasn’t the ordeal you feared. How’s the pain doing?

    Sam Elliott= Big Time Hubba-hubba

    Reply

    • Sandy Sue
      Dec 02, 2011 @ 10:00:14

      Did you ever see “The Sacketts” Sam Elliott and Tom Selleck. Oh my.
      The pain has toned down, the sharp bite is out of it now. Still not a laugh-riot, but at least there’s hope.

      Reply

  4. Kitty
    Dec 02, 2011 @ 09:54:34

    Well, you already know I love this part… If he had a cowboy hat, he would have touched a finger to it and muttered, “Ma’am.” That IS how I got my name after all… Different cowboy, but you get my drift. I’m so glad your staple removal did not meet expectations. Why do we do that to ourselves?

    Love you, Miss Kitty

    Reply

    • Sandy Sue
      Dec 02, 2011 @ 09:58:46

      I think it’s that human thing we do about living anywhere but in the Now.
      And I *forgot* that’s how you got your name. God bless the sound of jingling spurs!

      Reply

  5. Deb
    Dec 04, 2011 @ 22:09:47

    I recognize that knot!!! I’ve tied myself into several similar! Love you! Glad the icky staples are out!!!

    Reply

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