30 Days of Gratitude: Day 12

I admit it.  I’m not an easy friend.  I don’t chitchat or gossip.  I don’t like shopping or care about make-up and manicures.  I dig into your personal life and snap open your psyche.  And if you don’t behave or think the way I think you should, I’ll set you straight.  Oh, and then there’s that bipolar thing that tends to annoy and exhaust potential friends before we even get started.  No, I’m not easy.

So, it’s a miracle that I can claim two (count ’em, two!) new friends since moving back to Marshalltown five years ago.  I met Matt at the Tremont, the cafe where I first reclaimed my ability to write.  He would come in for iced tea before going to his salon across the street.  Loud, outrageous, hilarious, he’d slide into my booth and we would spin off into endless directions, talking in multiple foreign accents and laughing until we wet ourselves.  Also suffering from clinical depression, Matt and I understood each other in ways others couldn’t.  We knew when to push and challenge and when to empathize and be gentle.  I don’t see Matt as often as I did since converting to Haven as my coffee-shop-of-choice, but when we do get together, it’s like we were never apart.  That’s the sign of a true friend.

Funny how those coffee shops keep providing me with a social life.  Joyce manages the “front” at Haven.   With her Betty Rubble laugh, she sees Haven as her Shop of Joy.  Her compassion and caring keep people coming back.  She and I connected from the very first latte. She’s someone I can go deep with, talking about our feelings, our fears, our dreams.  We share a love of crafts and thrift shops.  We laugh a lot and talk in a street lingo only white, middle class, middle-aged women would ever think hip (we down w’dat, sista).  As a Christian, Joyce carries her faith gently, never shoving it onto others, just letting it guide her actions and her choices.  I respect her deeply for this since our town seems choked with rabid conservative blowhards.  Someone who actually practices their faith by action instead of word warms my cockles.

I’m blessed to have found these treasures—complex, fascinating, loving individuals who consider me their friend.  Even if I’m not easy.

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kitty
    Jul 14, 2011 @ 12:05:19

    You are not easy… but you’re worth it!


    • Sandy Sue
      Jul 15, 2011 @ 11:51:34

      Thanks, Kittygirl. I heard Lucille Ball once said to her father, “I’m hard to live with.” And her dad answered, “All the best women are.”


  2. Kathryn McCullough
    Jul 15, 2011 @ 00:06:47

    And these friends are blessed to have you! Easy or not!


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