Training Checklist: Set Priorities

The next area to master in my Bipolar Bad-Ass Training is something that strikes fear in the hearts of mere mortals.  The dreaded D word.

Discipline.

We hear that word and piddle ourselves, run away as fast as our quivering legs can take us.  Discipline means something we love is about to be snatched away, some sacrifice demanded.  And not in a nice way.

But actually, discipline means adding something positive to our lives, not taking something away.

These stable periods between episodes give me time to catch my breath, but I generally slide through them with a mind-set of entitlement.  The Universe owes me this time to rest.  As a Bad-Ass, I’m starting to look at this time a bit differently.

Every Bad-Ass has a mission, whether it’s blowing up zombies or making the world save from Visigoths.  They don’t mewl about whether the world is fair.  They don’t stray from their task.  They stay on target and get it done.  As a Bad-Ass, I had to take a look at my life and my mission.  What’s important to me?  How can I use this time between episodes to further my cause?   What do I need to do to get it done?

My mission is three-fold: Write, Make Art, and Go Back to School.

I currently have thee novels in various stages of completion.  They’ve been in these stages for several years.  While I write every day, I don’t always write on my novels.  Today, I move them to the top of my priority list.  I want them done.  I want to post them in my Heaving Bosoms pages on this blog.  The only way to do that is to write on them—every day.

Making collage and mixed-media art feeds my soul, but I also want to reclaim my old skills in drawing and painting.  The task is daunting to me because I was told many times that I couldn’t draw.  I flunked Art in high school.  Would that stop a Bad-Ass?  Hell, no.  Most would just whip out the shot-gun and put a hole in the art teacher (okay, let’s stay metaphoric and not go Columbine on any teacher’s ass).  In order to draw and paint, in order to grow as an artist, I have to make art—every day.

My long-term goal is to go back to school and get a master’s degree in psychology.  Aside from the financial hurdles, I’ll never be able to do that if I can’t read.  My ECT-induced reading disability has gotten better since I started working with a reading teacher, but getting better requires practice.  Reading is hard work.  I don’t enjoy it like I used to, but as a Bad-Ass I need to do it to reach my goal.  So the third item on my priority list is to read—every day.

This is my mission.  It won’t save the world, end wars or even help a kid struggling with school.  But this is what I want in my life, and I don’t have the luxury of time to add nobler or more heroic causes to the list.  I can get up every morning, focus, and actually do these three things.  I can use this training time to further my goals instead of flailing around, wishing I could do something “important.”

A Bad-Ass’ mission is always important, even if only to herself.

6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sherry
    Apr 20, 2011 @ 08:40:10

    All of your pictures of warrior-women include their arsenals that they will use as they mount their assault on their foes. You are gathering your arsenal around you so that you can do the same thing. Strength, dedication, determination, and resolve are great things to have available at your disposal. I’m proud of you and have your back in this battle. Yesterday I tried to send you a picture of the Klingon sisters but couldn’t seem to get it copied. Maybe you can find it. They are battling women if I ever saw one.

    Reply

  2. Fiddle gal
    Apr 20, 2011 @ 12:12:52

    Onward and upward. This was good for me to hear today. Thanks for the inspiration. I do wish that you would call yourself something a little kinder. I do not like my friend being called a bad-ass. How about Wonder Women, or Strong Women, or Women of Wisdom, WOW, Women of Worth. The pictures still will fit.

    Reply

  3. gypsy116
    Apr 20, 2011 @ 17:05:48

    Im so glad your feeling better, keep kicking ass hun!

    Reply

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