House of Cards

Because of my bipolar disorder, I’m unable to work, but I do receive Social Security Disability.  It’s enough to cover my basic needs, but I can’t afford health insurance.  I have Medicare only because the state pays my premium.  So, whenever I see a doctor, it’s always a crap shoot.  Will I be able to afford the treatment prescribed?  I do everything I can to stay out of the doctor’s office (even the office visit is outside my budget), but stuff like bronchitis needs attention, so I’m willing to empty out my piggy bank ( in my case it’s a pretty box that says “I see the Moon, and the Moon sees me).

Yesterday, while I was waiting at the Hy-Vee pharmacy, the tech came out and pulled me aside.  The antibiotics and inhaler my doctor ordered would cost me $230.  Holy crapitude!  The tech called my doc to see if he would substitute Cipro, which is on Hy-Vee’s $4.00 list, for the high-powered antibiotics.  He did.  I took that and left the inhaler behind, picked up some Robitussin cough syrup, and called it a day.

It would be so easy to launch into a rant about the health care system, health insurance, drug prices, etc., but I prefer not to do that today.  If my hero, President Obama, has his way, this all will get better eventually.  Instead, I’d like to offer up my gratitude to that thoughtful tech.  Instead of creating a potentially hysterical moment at the cash register, she came to me and offered options.  Becoming a person with meager means was a huge blow to my ego.  I invested a lot of energy into taking care of myself and making my own way in the world.  I had to learn how to ask for help, which choked me.  But pride is really a stupid thing to carry around—it really gets in the way.  I found that when I ask for help, it is always available.  I mean it.  Always.  It may not show up in the form I wanted or expected, but if I can let go of expectations, it always comes.  All I have to do is ask.  That’s all.

So, while I’m pretty sick, I’ve got drugs and all the time I need to get well.  I’m grateful for “the kindness of strangers.”  My life is full of blessings and the Universe feels like a loving place today.

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. strugglingwithbipolar
    Mar 29, 2011 @ 08:53:10

    I am sorry to hear you are sick. I get bronchitis and I have asthma. It is horribly uncomfortable and can cause me lots of grief. I also take Cipro and I have found that there isn’t a difference between the generic and the brand name.

    I hope you feel better soon.


    • Sandy Sue
      Mar 29, 2011 @ 16:47:57

      Thanks muchly. My doc wanted me to be on something more potent (since they use Cipro for anthrax, I can’t imagine what’s more powerful, but oh, well). Cipro and my own magical thinking will have to do!


  2. ManicMuses
    Mar 29, 2011 @ 20:09:40

    I hope you feel better soon, Sandy Sue. It’s crummy being sick. Get some rest & take care.


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